The Ditty of Carmeana

The beautiful, redheaded, and obnoxiously thin Princess Carmeana has been kidnapped and held ransom. The King, not wanting to incur the expense of deploying the army, decides to recruit a "fairy boy" to Rescue the Princess. In this third-person action adventure, Kai will travel all over the ostensibly medieval kingdom of Bowtudgel (rhymes with "cow cudgel") in his quest to Rescue the Princess. Along the way, he will solve puzzles, make money, conquer a set dungeons that are one-to-one with the Kingdom's major biomes, help people (sort of), kill enemies (sort of), buy hats, and find future DLC sidequests that you know very well the game developers will never get around to making. Along the way, he'll discover that there might be something even bigger at stake than a missing princess....